How Ann Arbor Did Me Wrong (vol. 2)-- or, Screw You, Frank Mejiers, Part One

When we moved out here to Ann Arbor, I quickly became acquainted w/ the hellpit known as Mejiers--- the Walmart of the Midwest. It's a giant discount grocery store w/ a giant crap merchandise section and a backwards-assed pharmacy where they do not even pretend to be aware of a little thing I like to call "HIPAA Privacy Rights".

I had a prescription for Nexium, so I took it to Mejiers to get it filled while I shopped. A week or so later, I got a letter in the mail from Astra-Zeneca, makers of The Little Purple Pill, welcoming me to some Nexium "club" into which I had been enrolled, informing me of all the great communications I would soon be receiving from Astra-Zeneca and its friends and affiliates via mail, email, and phone calls, and directing me to contact my friendly pharmacist should I have any questions about this "Club".

The fuck, you say? That's what I said. I promptly dialed Mejiers pharmacy on up and asked my friend there why the hell they were taking it upon themselves to enroll me in pharmaceutical marketing programs without consulting me on the matter. I asked why they were giving away my name, address, phone number, email address, not to mention my prescription history, to pharmaceutical companies without my consent.

Not to worry, my friend assured me, they didn't give my information away. Astra-Zeneca paid them for it.

Oh, ho, you say? Really? That's what I said. Then I said, "Are you familiar with HIPAA?"

"What?"

"HIPAA."

"No."

"HIPAA? You work with people's personal, protected medical information every day and you aren't familiar with HIPAA?"

"Let me get my manager."

Oh, assclown, please get your manager. I have words for her.

Unfortunately, the manager knew less about HIPAA than her cohort the pharmacist. Her take on my grievance with having my protected, personal information sold to a pharmaceutical company for marketing purposes without my consent--- "Well, they probably just want to send you some coupons or something."

My head exploded and I contacted Mejiers Corporate Legal Council, whom I informed of my intent to file a complaint with the Department of Health and Human Services.

They didn't much care. I switched to CVS. They still didn't much care. I hate you, Frank Mejiers, Chairman and CEO. Screw you and your non-ethical low prices.