Keepin' It Real

Right, so I re-read my blog and I smile and get the warm fuzzies at all the wonderful, happy, funny, sunny, rosey-perfect moments that JD and I share... But lest anyone think for one second that this is the only reality of our life together, read on. I'll be huddled in the corner over there, rocking back and forth and visualizing my happy place...

Seriously, I've never seen anything like it. JD and I went to storytime at the library as we do every Wednesday. He started getting ansty after about 20 minutes, but, hey, he's 16 months old, what kind of attention span can you expect? So we pack up and head out.

Now, he went into the stroller OK, but after about a block, he started what I assumed was a temper tantrum. And man oh man, this kid can work a temper tantrum; we've BTDT times 2,000, so I kept pushing and tried to think my own thoughts. But then he shifted into actually crying, like he does when he is sick, hurt, or something is wrong. I perked up and started to worry, but then he shifted back into screaming, bucking, temper tantrum mode. He spent the next 20 minutes shifting back and forth between the two, screaming and sobbing.

I was getting more and more worried; like I said, he is no stranger to the tantrum, but this was taking it to a whole new level. Something, something bad, had to be wrong. Bad wrong. Like, "Mama, please help me, I am being ravaged by the ebola virus and my insides are turning into jelly" wrong. But of course, I really had no idea what was wrong. I determined that he wasn't cold, wet, hot, hungry, tired, dirty, pinched, stung, ad nauseum, and I was pretty sure that he hadn't been bitten by a Reston monkey. Between the scuh-REEM-ing and the worrying, I was starting to get a little edgy.

We finally got home, and he was still screaming and sobbing, so worked up that he was coughing and gagging. I was starting to really freak out; I've never seen him like this. And I could not get him to calm down, no matter what I did. I was at a total loss. I was scared, I was worried, I was sad to see my baby so upset, and honestly, I was kind of pissed off. He had been screaming, screaming, at me for over 30 minutes, and I kind of just wanted him to STFU. Then I felt guilty, assy, and just plain horrid for thinking that when my son was obviously dying from the ebola.

A few more minutes went by, I was just about to dial 911 (no lie), when the screams suddenly stopped. JD had noticed his LeapFrog Learning Table, and was suddenly and inexplicably entranced with the "Greeeeeen....TRI-an-gull" button. That little bastard was acting like nothing ever happened. 'Scuse me? Ebola, anyone? Oh no? You weren't dying? You were just mad? You didn't really know why? You may have over-reacted? Your bad?

So that's another, different-but-not-uncommon, slice-of-life with JD. He is, no doubt, the best, most amazing, most wonderful, sunny, funny, smiley, rosey-perfect baby in the world, but you know, he keeps it real. And now, I need a stiff drink.